As the subtitle reads, Radicality is a life lived in abandon toward God. It is a move beyond practicality to an adventure into the unknown. It is an invitation that God gives us to lean on Him fully and walk with Him daily. I cannot say that I totally understand it, but I can tell you that when you say yes to Him, it is the wildest ride you will ever take. And it is definitely worth the price of admission.
My personal journey started when I was very frustrated with the work I was doing. I didn't know if I should go back to school, start writing as a profession or something else. I simply didn't know. Two days later, I had flown to Arizona for a meeting. Before my colleague and I headed out for sushi, I knelt by the bed in the hotel and prayed the prayer of Jabez. I finally asked the Lord what He wanted me to do with my life.
That night, I was watching the New York Yankees pummel the Arizona Diamondbacks. I must admit I did not expect the Lord to answer so quickly, but He did. It was almost as though He breathed a big sigh of relief, and that release breathed new life into me. He kept me up all night with ideas for a company. It was nothing short of amazing how things fell into place.
As things progressed toward starting the company, I became very ill. I had struggled with a heart condition from the time I was a teenager. The symptoms had been controlled by heart medication for nearly a decade. However, the side effects of the medication and other issues developed - from serious fatigue to infection and illnesses that were debilitating and nearly took my life. In many ways my world became very small. I couldn't drive, do laundry, often could only speak in a whisper. I couldn't run or bike. I couldn't listen to music or read without getting a splitting headache (with the exceptions of the Bible and Purpose Driven Life). I slept a great deal due to the fatigue. Often, I had days when I couldn't walk. Then on days when I could, I walked with a cane for 8 months. Many of my biggest stress relievers were taken away. In fact, every word I would have used to describe myself was taken away - strong, smart, independent, self-reliant, etc, that is, with the exception of one - Christian. And that was where the healing began.
During the time of illness, the Lord used the Bible to sustain and encourage me greatly. He used Purpose Driven Life to enlighten me about the journey He and I had been on and to move me toward the realization that He wanted more of me. I had always belonged to Him. I also had the great privilege and blessing of being raised in and by the church, seeing faith, love and generosity lived out before my very eyes. There also was a great man the Lord sent to help me see that Jesus was a part of our lives every day. Because of these influences, I have lived a life generally leaning on and toward God, and prayed and read my Bible nearly every day since I was 11. In the midst of all this devotion to Him, all this study of Him, something still was missing. Yes even with all of this, God wasn't my CEO, and He wanted all of me.
So as my world became very small, my life became entirely His. As He healed me physically, He began to do a much greater work and heal me emotionally as well. I can say quite honestly that He has led me up to the mountaintops and through the darkest valleys. And He reminds me of something a great evangelist wrote: that the mountaintops provide great views, but the fruit is borne in the valley. There is a lot to tell, but suffice it to say that now I want Him more than anything, and I finally learned what Paul meant when he wrote about praying unceasingly.
Wild stuff. Radical stuff. No more practicality. Here am I Lord. Send me.
Until next time...
O LORD, we have waited for You;
The desire of our soul is for Your name
And for the remembrance of You.
With my soul I have desired You in the night,
Yes, by my spirit within me I will seek You early (Isaiah 26:8-9a, NKJV).
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